I knew it was coming in the mail. My sister called to tell me that while going through my Grandmother's belongings, my Aunt had found a journal I had given my Grandmother as a birthday gift years ago. Inside, my Aunt found the card I had given her along with the gift. I heard she ran it to the post office -- she knew I would want it.
I prepared myself. I was excited to receive her journal --her poetry. I have been running to the mailbox every day to see if it had arrived.
Today her journal arrived. I stopped at the mailbox on my way to pick Isaac up from school and there it was. I was so excited to get the package, yet somehow frightened by it. I set it next to me. I tried to breathe.
It set on the passenger seat the whole way to school. I contemplated opening it at every red light. I managed to wait until I got to the parking lot before ripping open the wrinkled, white envelope. Flipping through the pages, I became overwhelmed and drove home.
I knew what would be inside. I knew it would be her silly, playful poems. I knew it would be her sensitive, private heart. What I didn't expect her was her soul. I shook. I choked. I cried. I was rendered breathless at moments. I feel like I had one last conversation with my dear, dear friend. I feel I was given a gift.